Why I’m Better Than You

Why I’m Better Than You: A Love Story

 

Dearest Tedward,

By the time this letter finds you, I will be long gone. Please don’t be surprised when you find a few minor things missing. I needed them, you see, and I didn’t think you would mind much. I’ve taken very little really. In the grand scheme of things, what’s a car? What’s a house? What’s a firstborn child? Or a right arm? Or a kidney? In the end, you’ve still got what’s important, like your sense of self-esteem, and life can go on as it always has. (Although I’d suggest you drive automatics from now on.)

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the meanest bear in the world